Falling in Love with Arequipa

May27

We currently find ourselves in the lovely southern city of Arequipa. Though I was enchanted by Cusco, it’s brisk nights and cloudy days were starting to get to us. So we did as we’ve done before and hopped on a night bus- to wake up in a new city.

It was clear on our first day in Arequipa, that this was a special place…The cloudless skies & sunshine, outstanding cuisine and amazing Spanish colonial architecture. With a central plaza that has to be one of the most beautiful in all of Peru; exotically trimmed trees, flowers, palm trees, stone fountains and flocks of overly friendly pigeons giving free aviation shows. Benches filled with happy families; peaceful political protesters, tourists with cameras, ice cream cart venders. Snow-capped mountains and volcanos overlook the city.

It’s all very charming, really.

Anna and I have spent the last two days aimlessly wandering the city- learning the streets, exploring it’s nooks and crannies; eating street food (the skewer lady by the Cathedral is best) eating at Sangucheria’s (the amazing sandwich and smoothie cafes), eating the ice creams and desserts the city is rightfully known for; basically just eating in general; spotting plazas, parks, vibrant markets, ancient cathedrals.

The definition of pleasant.

Our first night in Arequipa, we suffered from exhaustion and confusion as a result of a long overnight bus ride, and succumb to our weakness when we take a hostel recommendation from our taxi driver (note: don’t do it). We book the night at a musty, dilapidated hospedaje. Dingy, dungeon like rooms, mold, century-old sheets, damp bathrooms- the faint sound of a baby crying, and a doorbell from hell (literally went on for a full minute anytime anyone rang it). But we all got our own private rooms and bathroom; for around $7. Anna ends up sharing my room. This place was far too depressing to sleep alone.

We move to the Point Hostel early the next day. A breath of fresh air; a five star hotel compared to our previous night; open aired, spanish tiles, sunshine streaming down on vibrant blue walls, a large friendly lounge area filled with friendly travelers from around the world; a bar and WIFI.

We get the small rooftop dormitory; with access to the glorious rooftop patio. We are pampered by the clean bathrooms with hot water. This is more like it.

On our second day we wander some more. This is a city meant to be explored by foot. We indulge in more sandwiches from heaven, and ridiculously large waffle bowls of gelato ($2.50 US!).

In the afternoon we decide to join others from our hostel and head to a dance club on the outskirts of town. This place turns out to be surreal- 3 pm in the afternoon and its packed to the brink with Peruvians drinking large plastic cups of beer, dancing to Muscia Latina… there are performers on stage rousing the club patrons- 4 or 5 men dancing to the music- reminiscent of Chip N Dale dancers- Peruvian women screeching at them. There are women dressed as nurses giving out “shots” and there is a man in a crazy costume and wig with a ghostbuster-like gun shooting liquid into clubbers mouths. This is a bizarre place; but we dance away the rest of the afternoon. A Peruvian club is like a Zumba class with Cynthia- Anna and I know every other song played.

We get home just after 6 pm grab phenomenal pizza from a cafe near our hostel, hang out in the hostel lounge for a few hours; and decide to call it an early night.

On this day- we haven’t quite decided how we’ll spend it. I currently sit on the roof top with my iPod and bluetooth keyboard; with the hot sun and the sounds of the city. We have a long night bus to Lima departing late tomorrow evening (and a flight to Ecuador on Wednesday), so we’ve decided to do a full day tour to Colca Canon (one of the worlds largest canons, famous for its condors and breathtaking landscape) tomorrow. It’s a 3 AM departure; so we may go white water rafting this afternoon, or eehh, we may spend another day eating and wandering. Since Anna is napping, I may also take a nap in the sunny hammock?

Just some of the tough decisions we are currently faced with…>

I walked to Machu Picchu

May26

At this moment, I sit in an internet cafe in Arequipa, Peru. The noise of the streets, instant message beeping, and the singing of an unidentifiable insect, act as hypnotizing background music. A Peruvian couple near me holds their baby, dressed in a communian gown, up to their computer screen- undoubtably showing her off to her grandparents across the country.

Sun streams in through the open door, and for the first time in days- I am actually warm.

I am feeling a strange sort of exhaustion. As with all of the last 20 days, the past couple days have been a bit of a blur. My brains strains when trying to put the pieces together correctly-but not because I´ve been drinking unusual amounts of alcohol or smoking spliffs like many of my fellow long term travellers. I suspect my lack of brain power comes from a lack of sleep, a lack of oxygen to the brain, and a lack of familiarity.

For this reason, I´ll need another day to fully process the beautiful city I now find myself in.

As for the last couple weeks…
Back to May 16-

Ignoring the fact that I had been sick for the prior week, I booked a last minute Salkantay trek for the following day. Either I was high on the lack of oxygen to my brain, or the SuperGerman I had been traveling with got to me with his ¨go get ém¨ attitude and pep-talk conversational style.

I spent around $260 on the 5 day trek, Machu Picchu tickets, return train & bus tickets, and rented gear. All and all a good deal. I would be joining 13 other trekkers, and when all was said and done we would be walk/trek 50-60 miles.

DAY 1

My guide- a goofy Peruvian who strikes a resemblance to Yogi the bear-called Edwin, swings by my dismal hostel around 430 AM, and we walk to other nearby hostels to pick up fellow trekkers- This includes- a couple from Miami and their coworker friend, a couple from Oregan, an incredibly entertaining and well-travelled Norwiegan, 6 Brazillians, 2 Dutch Brothers, myself, and our 2 guides. It´s a good group.

After a 2 hour ride, we reach our starting point. After a sub-par breakfast at a local place, we begin our 6 hour walk for the day. This will be one of the toughest days for me. My body struggles with the altitude and a general feeling of weakness from not eating enough the prior 4 days. Talking with other Trekkers in my group helps the time pass smoothly.

Salkantay Day 1

We have plenty of time to get to know one another, and I find out early on that I got lucky with my group. We become a sort of family over the next 5 days.

As we reach base camp at the end of day 1, it takes every last bit of my energy to climb into my tent. We gather as a group for tea, then our mandatory bowl of pre-meal soup. For dinner, we dine on the traditional Peruvian dish of Lomo Saltado. I´m unable to eat anything other than rice. My stomach feels no better than it has in days. I go to sleep that night dreading the start of day 2- the day everyone claims is the hardest of the entire trek. The day we reach the top of Salkantay.

Near base camp day 1

DAY 2

Luckily I wake from about the best nights sleep one can attain from a tent. I feel energetic and ready to go. Day 2 will be difficult but rewarding on an almost spiritual level. Day 2 will end up being my favorite trekking day.

The first 4-5 hours are spent at a steady incline. Despite the difficulty of breathing, and the steady climb, I feel good when we finally reach the top of the mountain. There is a general sense of euphoria at the top- everyone understanding that the toughest part of their journey is over. Each person in our group places a rock onto a pile, silently asking for a wish for their journey. Our guide Edwin poors chicha (corn beer) over the rock pile, as an offering to Pachamama.

Day 2 Salkantay Trek

Day 2 ends at an amazing base camp on the edge of a cliff, panoramic mountains views surround us, impossibly bright stars above. We have a jovial dinner and a beer to celebrate the end of our toughest day.

Day 3
Day three begins a little later than the previous. We head along dusty gravel roads, among the stunning mountain views, a rocky river passing far below. As we near lunch time we enter a jungle trail. Our guide stops to show us medicinal plants, passion fruit and wild strawberries. The weather is hotter than its been in days. Lunch is in a mountain village. We dine on quinoa, a salad of beets and carrots, pasta, and avocado. Our best lunch yet.

Now we take a roller coaster of a mini bus ride to the nearby mountain village of Santa Theresa. Our base camp is at the end of the village, next to a dilapidated building- ie home to our bathrooms. We quickly unload our things before heading to hot springs for an evening soak. This is near heaven for all of us. Days of walking; of being cold and dirty, sweaty and hot, dissolve in the soothing thermal water. We soak, and chat as long as we can before heading to dinner at camp. A rousing dance party around a bonfire ends the day.

Day 4
The first half of day four consists of many hours of walking along a long, hot, dusty mountain road, ending at a strange industrial town called Hydroelectrica. We have lunch in a shelter among banana trees.

The second part of the day has us walking to Aguas Calientes- the jumping off point to Machu Picchu. My body is beyond exhausted at this point. I’m feeling weak and dirty from lack of hearty food and no showers; but I’m in a great mood and enchanted by the scenery. At this point we are walking along a train tracks near the back and bottom part of Machu Picchu.

The scenery at this point begins to feel mystical; lush tropical plants, tall ancient trees, smooth boulders popping out of the powerful river, and more sharp green mountains surround us. It’s at this point that you can truly feel the presence of the ancient Inka city.

We reach Aguas Calientes and head to our hostels. I bunk with two friendly Dutch brothers. We take our first hot shower in 5 days, and head to a dinner at a nearby restaurant. Everyone is excitedly chattering, anticipating our early morning departure to the climax of our journey. We try Cuy, a Peruvian delicacy, that is essentially a whole roasted guinea pig. I struggled to even try a little- my beloved childhood pets in mind.

The Grand Finale

The moment we’ve all been anticipating…

We awaken at 4 the next morning, and begin the 60-90 min walk. 4 days of walking, paired with the sickness I continued to feel, weighed heavily on me as I climbed the final 2,000 steps leading to the ancient city. I reach my final step, arriving at the first view. The mobs of early morning tourists oohing and ahhing aren’t enough to ruin the living postcard in front of me. Clouds and mist blanket the ruins, changing with every passing second. Each direction I look another stunning view. It isn’t just the skillfully constructed city that takes our breath away; but the mystical mountainous perch on which it sits.

I actually find myself getting a little choked up. Maybe because of physical and mental exhaustion, but also because this is a moment I feel I have earned- one that I worked so hard to arrive at. A moment that cannot be described or captured through a camera.

And this is one place that lived up to its reputation.

We spend nearly 10 hours wandering through her ancient passageways, siting and gazing, watching llamas graze among the ruins, and climbing to higher points. undoubtably, this will be one of the highlights of all my travels.

Wait, what day is it again?

May16

It has been, what- around 11 days since I departed Chicago, and I´ve already started forgetting what day of the week it is. Don´t even ask the time. My days have all started to merge together… Was that yesterday that we climbed Ciero Blanco?? Nope, 2 days ago.

Its all a very strange and surreal- though undoubtably good feeling.

I really need to try harder to write in my journal- and in this blog- for no other reason than to keep track of time. Every day here has been so packed to the brink, it´s nearly impossible to remember it all. And my memories are important to me- they will be my most valuable souvenir.

Let´s look at this past Saturday alone- our day began with an early morning trek up Ciero Blanco, spectacularly exhilarating sandboarding, followed by lunch at a little local place, next we explored the streets of Nazca, ventured to a nearby village for a traditional Inka festival, climbed to an ancient magnetic energy field, caught a ride home from a Police truck filled with locals wearing party hats and drinking wine, joined a local family whom we met on said truck for wine in the lively plaza, grabbed fried chicken and fries for a late dinner, THEN hopped on a 14 hour bus ride to Cuzco….

Sandboarding the world largest sand dune

Anna and I at a small Inka festival

On a 14 hour bus ride we were both extremely lucky enough to have slept for about 90 percent of

How about Sunday- Woke up in a new hostel, in a new city, took a tour on horseback to The Temple of the Moon, explored the magical streets of Cuzco, grabbed food at a market, bought alpaca sweaters, and planned for Machu Picchu. Unfortunately due to a nasty case of Montezuma´s revenge (I won´t go into it- nobody said traveling was glamorous all the time), I had to skip out on the Salsa lessons and clubbing that Anna and Max were so lucky to partake in. I don´t want to talk about that. Luckily, I woke up Tuesday morning feeling (mostly) myself again.

Tuesday was a day for planning and coordinating, exploring. I made the decision to do a trek to Machu Picchu and began sorting my options.

In the evening I met with my Panama layover friends, one of whom just began a job with a volunteer travel agency in Cusco. While visiting her we learned of an opportunity to have dinner with a group of Peruvian students in their student housing. Naturally we decided to go for it.

The group of 25 or so students were incredibly gracious hosts- providing us with a home cooked meal of Aji de Gallina, and for dessert -a thick hot, purple syrupy drink. Strange but soothing. We were encouraged to talk with the students ( since the actual group we were with was apart of the Spanish school), and then we all had to introduce ourselves in our non-native language.

This moment was another reminder of how much I want to improve my Spanish… My evening would only add to that feeling.

Later in the evening, myself and my friends went to bar a little off the gringo path. The place was warm and wet and smokey and dark, with musica Latina bouncing off the walls. The three of us notice we are the only white people. We sat with two random patrons and bought a couple liters of beer to share. We chatted with our new friends (some of us understood more than others). The more Peruvians I meet, the more I love this country.

As the night warms up we are invited to dance salsa… We stay on the dance floor until the bar closes at 1.

It’s a good night.

Today I booked my trek, bought and rented gear and supplies, and finally laid low a little.

Tomorrow I wake a little after four, to join 9 strangers on a 5 day trek ending at Machu Picchu ….wow

Departures, Panama City and Pisco Sour

May8

5 AM Saturday, Monroe WI- I wake after 2 hours of anxious sleep. Stayed up later than expected trying to figure out my proof of onward travel situation. Ended up reluctantly buying a ticket to Ecuador for May 30. Was glad I had it when the Spirit agents gave me a hard time about my one-way ticket.

11 AM Saturday, Chicago- My 9:30 flight turned into an 11 AM flight. First tip off that Spirit Air is a `you get what you pay for´ kind of airline. Unformfortable flight, no leg room, perfectly erect seating.

5:00 ish? Saturday, Ft Lauderdale- Board connecting plane to Lima. Wait. Spirit announces that it has overbooked the flight by 24 fliers, or that we are too heavy for the plane/fuel, or some other lame excuse. They ask if anyone would be willing to catch the flight out of Panama the following day. They would provide accomodations and a free flight voucher. I´m too busy chatting with my interesting seat mates to notice.

After a few minutes and a low response, Spirit makes it 2 free flight vouchers anywhere they fly (US & Latin America). I shoot out of my seat, grab my pack and dash to the front.

Picture by Mary O´Connor

So begins a very interesting start to my travels. From here, myself and the 23 others, wait for directions for Spirit. We learn we won´t depart for another couple hours, so we head to grab a beer in one of the airport bars. The hodge podge of travellers opting to fly out of Panama ranges from a church group heading to work in a Peruvian orphanage, to a Peruvian American heading to visit family, to a couple young people heading to work for non profits or tour agencies, to another traveller just embarking on his own one-year travel adventure. Brought together by the stupidity of an airline, we are all instant compadres.

Hotel Aeropuerto, Panama, 4AM (photo by Mary Oconnor)

The Fabulous (and completely free for me) Aeropuerto Hotel in Panama City

Sometime between 3 and 4 AM, Sunday Hotel Aeropuerto: Panama City, Panama- Exhausted yet hopped up on travel-induced adrenaline we arrive at our GORGEOUS hotel. It becomes quickly clear this will be the fanciest hotel I stay in possibly for my entire trip. Apparently this is one (and the only?) area Spirit does not skimp on. Anticipating the 24 hour pool and jacuzzi a group of people went in on a bottle of duty free booze and sweet tea. We proceed to stay up until dawn hanging at the pool, drinking cocktails out of plastic cups. After an early and very tasty breakfast of fresh fruit and toast at the hotel we grab the airport shuttle.

9:30 AM Sunday, Airport in Panama- I am given the disapointing news that I was not scheduled to be on the same flight as my 23 other layed-over co-travellers. The Spirit agent had neglected to mention I was the only one who was supposed to be on the 9 am flight. My flight had already departed. Luckily the clerk was able to put me on the 6:30 pm flight.

Desperately trying to nap

10 AM Hotel Aeropuerto, again-Exhausted and bummed I have to leave my new companions, I catch the hotel shuttle back to the hotel. Because we had already checked out, I essentially squat at the pool for most of the afternoon. Though this sounds pleasant, the fact that I was running on 2 hours of quality sleep over the past 48 hours, and that the weather had turned cloudy and rainy, made the 4 hours I waited at the hotel an anxious mixture of trying and failing to nap on damp lounge chair; and trying and failing to find a place to safely charge my iPod. Boredom drives me to actually go to the airport 3.5 hours early. Hmmm. This was a bad idea too, as the Panama airport is nothing special. Too tired to read, iPodbattery too low to play with, I plopped on a bench and stared into space. When I finally board, I fall instantly asleep and stay that way for much of the nearly 4 hour flight.

11:15 PM Sunday, International Airport in Lima- I arrive, feeling half alive, but alive nonetheless. Disoriented, unable to get wifi on my iPod, I wander aimlessly until I find a white-haired Aussie grandma talking with a taxi driver. I decided to piggyback with her to Miraflores, figuring it be a good bet for finding a hostel at that time of night.

12 AM-I arrive in Miraflores, find a hotspot and check my email to find a message from my Panama layover friends that they are staying at Link Hostel in Miraflores. I find out I am a short walk away. I check in for the night. Sleep doesnt come until 1:30, and is interupted periodically by dorm mates wrestling with their backpacks and leaving throughout the early hours.

9 AM Monday, Link Hostel, Lima-I grab the free hostel breakfast of buns & jelly, instant coffee, as my friends trickle into the commons area. Three of them are staying at Link, and have no plans for the day. We reunite and devise a rough plan, to take off and explore the area by foot.

I have arrived!

We head toward the beach. We stumble on Lovers Park, a lovely little park with mosiac benches and a brilliant sculpture looking down on a stunning view of the sea. The weather is a perfect 74 degrees and sunny. We stroll, chatting, snapping pictures and taking in the view. We decide to grab a cab to the Barranco Neighborhood to find a place to relax and eat.

Cafe in Barranco

Barranco is even cooler than I expected; with its Bohemian vibe , ecclectic Spanish buildings, and knarly old trees sprouting up from stone walkways- all with access to lovely views of the sea. We find a café promoting free pisco sours with meal. This place is pretty amazing: outdoor seating with a view. It turns out to be ridiculously expensive. We bitch about it but decide it was worth it for the food, experience and ambiance…and delicious drinks.

Wonderful Peruvian appetizers (photo by Mary O`Connor)

Pisco by the sea. (Photo by Mary OConnor)

After the pisco cocktails our night turns into a fantastic blurr of Solo Saltado, Crystal (Peruvian brand of beer), bus rides, rum & cokes, drinks at a fancy seaside bar, pitchers of crystal & fantastic live music at a bohemian jazz club, chilling on our hostel rooftop, and passing out sometime in the early morning hours.

10 AM Tuesday morning, Link Hostel- Wake up covered in dust and dirt (from chilling on the flilthy dirty rooftop) with a depilitating hangover.

Together for one more outing, the 4 of us grab superb sandwiches and fresh fruit juice at a cafe near the park. After eating, myself and another catch a bus to downtown Lima, for some more rather aimless wandering, and snapping of pictures. We head back to the hostel, he leaves for Ica, myself and the remaining Panama-layover victim, spend the rest of the uploading pictures, answering emails, waiting for an early bed time.

All in my first 4 days on the road …

Packing for an unforeseeably long trip

May4

Even I find the thought perplexing–how exactly does one pack for a trip with no planned ending? How on Earth will I possibly stuff my single carry-on sized backpack with all the clothing, gear and everyday essentials to outfit me as I travel through a plenitude of climates–from Amazonian jungle to arid dessert; from to the cool Andean highlands to the sunny beach; to scorching hot/dry volcanos to cool/damp cloud forests–for upwards to a year.

I figured out pretty early in the process that I’d adapt the old Rick Steve’s/Rolf Potts approach– pack half the crap I think I’ll need and plan for twice the budget–i.e. there are stores in Latin America.

So here’s the lowdown…

ALL OF IT

All of my possessions for the next….?

THE PACK
The process of choosing a pack was similar to that of choosing an apartment. I will be living from it. It will contain all my possessions. That thought alone makes me giddy.

With some research and deliberation behind me, I headed to REI to get my hands on a few packs. I didn’t necessarily need something to trudge through the wilderness or “backpack camp” with, but I wanted something more comfortable & portable then a roller duffle. It needed to be tough and light, practical and carry-on compatible.

Considering that criteria I settled on the Osprey Porter 46, which features a panel-loading opening, lockable zippers & stowaway straps, outer compression straps; weighs in at just 3.5 Ibs, with just the right dimensions for carry-on. A Christmas present REI gift card from my grandparents helped take care of the reasonable $99 price tag.

My new friend–The Osprey Porter 46

PACKING AIDS
To keep all of my stuff organized:
Packing cubes, for keeping clothing, undies in order & easy to find.
Plastic “envelopes,” for keeping electronics & importants docs safe & dry.

ELECTRONICS

-Kindle 3G–loaded with fun stuff (I can hardly wait for my first long day of trains, plains & automobiles)
-Bluetooth Keyboard for iPod touch–an incredibly thoughtful gift from my former coworkers at The Colony. Now I can blog from ANYWHERE.
-Camera & iPod chargers & surge protecter
-Cocoon Organizer- to keep cords, chargers, extra batteries & memory cards, USB card reader, earbuds, jump drive, back up ion batteries. Pretty darn cool; not sure how I managed to live without this thing for so long?
-iPod Touch–bought it refurbished; for Wifi; keeping up with emails, skype/facetime with the fam.

TOILETRIES, MEDICAL STUFF, etc.

toothpaste & brush, floss, shampoo & conditioner bars, in foldable shower bag with hook

Neosporin, Allergy meds, probiotics, malaria meds, bandaids, ginger gum,anti diarrheal, pain killers, antibacterial wipes, motion sickness meds, etc.

Bugspray, earplugs, sunscreen, lotion, kleenex (good as TP too), headbands, contact lens stuff & eyedrops, tweezers, face wash, Chapstick, Downey wrinkle release spray.

CLOTHING

Undergarments –3 bras, 4 pairs underwear, 4 pairs socks (not including the ones I’ll wear), 1 bikini .

1 pair quick-dry grey hiking/everyday pants, 2 leggings, 1 jeans, 1 pair athletic shorts, 1 icebreaker base layer long-sleeved t-shirt, Wind/Rain jacket (not pictured– khaki cargo pants, wearing on plane). I’ll be on the lookout for a few clothing items, when on the road.

3 tanks, 2 tees, 1 quick-dry reversible Golite dress (not pictured: 1 tank, 1 icebreaker t-shirt, 1 merino pullover, 1 Columbia fleece; wearing on plane)

SHOES

Flip Flops, Keen waterproof low hikers, Keen strappy sandals.

RANDOM ESSENTIALS

Small crossbody bag, small backpack (which I’ll use as my “one personal item” on the plane), money belt.

For a little luxury; and to use in extra dingy hostels…a cocoon sheet.

Travel Towel–in XL; call me spoiled, but I wanted to be able to actually wrap the thing around my body.

Plastic envelope containing important paperwork, photocopies of passport, vaccinations, prescriptions, itineraries, etc.

Also–
-Moon Cup -Hassle free & environmentally friendly (not to overshare or anything).
-Doorstop (for when I want to lock myself in my room, and feel safe).
-Safety whistle (read this).
-Journal & mini moleskin, pens.
- Head lamp.
-Plastic Eddie Bauer spork/knife.
-Universal drain stopper & laundry soap.
-Small waterproof wallet with clip (good ‘ol Bass Proshop).
- Sea Bands (for bus/boat induced nausea).
- 2 pairs eyeglasses, 1 pair sunglasses, lots of contacts.
-Rain cover for pack.
-Eye mask & REI travel neck pillow (along with ear plugs–”luxury” items; sleep aids).
-Reusable water bottle.
-Reusable shopping bag.
-Spanish Phrase book & fun size “Food in Latin America dictionary & guide” (I take my food seriously).
-Business/or “contact” cards.
-Wet Ones.
- 3 random TSA locks for luggage/hostels/etc.
-Point & shoot camera, with super tough case.

And somehow, it all fits just right. Weighs in at 22 lbs…

Missed items that came to mind while writing this article:

-Thank you notes for couch surfing hosts, etc.
- Comb & deodorant (looks like my subconscious wants me to go “dirty-hippie?”)

Am I missing anything? Anything I should cut?

Strange, yet not so strange at all

May3

People keep asking me how I’m feeling–am I’m excited? Am I scared? Am I sad? Am I happy to be done with work? etcetera, etcetera

To be honest, I don’t have a great answer for any of those questions:

Am I excited–of course, though after months and months spent in a strange internal state of excitement, anxiety has conquered excitement. For now.

Am I scared–of course, I’ve quit my job. That paycheck I’ve gotten so used to seeing in my bank account will no longer make its friendly weekly visit. My finances, like my ticket to Peru, are now one-way. The cozy routine I’ve followed the last few years has all but disintegrated.

Am I sad–of course. Sadness always comes with leaving those you love. And though I’ll come back, I won’t come back to the life I’ve known these past couple years. This trip represents the conclusion of one chapter of my life, and the start of another. This is a melancholy thing, but also exciting. New chapters are almost always exciting.

Am I happy to be done with work? While it’s a mostly positive feeling, it’s all strangely anticlimactic. I still just feel like I’m taking a couple days off of work, or that I never really had that job in the first place (wrap your head around that one and you’ll get a feel for my current state of mind).

Maybe it’s disbelief? Maybe denial? I suppose I can’t quite believe this trip is about to happen. Clearly it hasn’t truly “hit me” yet. I wonder when it will. I wonder if it will. Will month 3, month 6, month 9 (??) come around, and I’ll still feel like I’m on a 10-day trip to the twilight zone… like I’ll return to work on Monday … feeling like the whole thing never happened? Like it was some long, comatose dream.

Or, will I get on that plane, and like I often do when I stare out those tiny round windows, come to some profound realization, and it will all just hit me at once– like a 25 pound backpack.

I suppose when the fog clears, readiness remains. I’m feeling about as ready as I’ve ever felt. Maybe even too ready? Like it’s this big deal, that doesn’t quite feel like a big deal at all. Like from a distance, it was this big shadow, but now that the light shines on it, it’s something quite small. Something not at all big or scary.

Or a little similar, I’m sure, to how my brother feels right now–in his first new house, with his first baby on the way. After the work has been done; lines have been waited in; necessary hoops jumped through; days spent; overwhelming bouts of excitement felt. After all that learning has occurred– those next BIG steps start to feel like they are all just apart of another natural progression. Like it’s all apart of something much bigger than ourselves. Something quite wonderful.

Yeah, it’s all so strange, yet not so strange at all.

where the sadness comes in–me, with just some of my overwhelmingly wonderful family

Leap and the net will appear

Monthly Archives: May 2012